Wish
by Rulz
Summary: A sad story about Kai Hiwatari's past.


This is a sad story, so if you don't want to be saddened, then I suggest you don't read this!  
  
Otherwise, I hope you find this story moving.  
  
I have refrained from using Kai's name as much as possible in order to allow the reader to relate to the character more, and to find something in common with him. Literary license and all. :)  
  
Please leave a review at the end. Feedback will be welcome.  
  
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Wish  
  
He sat on the silvery rock, its jagged edges capturing the moonlight rays. Below him was a seemingly midnight black pool of water, twinkling as the ripples reflected the moonlight. In the distance, the shadows and streetlights of a nearby village could be sighted. On the cliff ledge where he was sitting, it was silent.  
  
There were no people around. Not a figure in sight. Except for his lone dark shape, the ledge was deserted.  
  
Which was what he loved about that place.  
  
Here, where he often spent night after night, watching the fading sunset and the stars glittering above, was his zone. Where he felt comforted. Safe. Familiar.  
  
There was a slight smell of moist grass, and the musky smell of chrysanthemums, which grew abundantly amongst the jaded trees behind him, was a pleasant fragrance. Because he knew it so well.  
  
He sighed. Why was it that he always felt happiest here, when in fact he would often end up thinking about the things which upset him the most? The things that hurt. The things that were so painful, he could barely stand to think about them, but when he did, it all came in a rush, a tidal wave wrought with raw emotions and pain.  
  
He was lonely.  
  
And that was possibly the worst feeling anyone could ever experience.  
  
Maybe it was partially his fault. Yeah, he pushed people away. Didn't let them get in. Never showed his emotions.  
  
But after all that he'd been through..  
  
He tried to stop the threatening wave of sadness and rage from engulfing his entire body. But resistance was apparently futile, as flashes of hurt and regret and remorse filled every pore of his mind, filled every one of his senses, and raised feelings so raw and so vibrant that he could barely cope.  
  
Flashes of his childhood..  
  
How when he was a young boy, of about five years old, watching as his father made a rare visit to his house..  
  
How happy he was to have experienced that first glimpse of his father walking through the front door, his mother's face lighting up at the prospect...  
  
The arguments, the rage he sensed between his parents as his mother asked where the hell he had been for so long..  
  
He being sent to bed, ignored by his parents as they shouted at each other...  
  
Him trying to sleep..covers over his head, trying to drown out his mother's crying and his father's yelling..  
  
Him weeping, forgotten, wanting his parents to be happy, but not being able to do anything as a helpless child of five..  
  
He closed his eyes. It always came back to this. His unhappiness. He could remember the day when his father left forever, never to return, leaving his mother and him, a young boy, alone, left to fend for themselves. And then those frightening days when his mother had been in an accident, and how, just aged six, he was made to wait..to wait for the dreadful news which was not unexpected, but nevertheless the most frightening thing that could ever happen.  
  
And how when he was told the news, his father came back, but with a scary, authoritative man, who was his Grandfather...  
  
And he was taken away, living in a harsh prison, where he was made to train as the ultimate fighter, as the toughest competition to be released from that abbey since it had opened...  
  
And he remembered how he would cry at night, when the rest of the boys were sleeping, trying to hold back the hot tears, but failing.  
  
He opened his eyes, and looked across at the mysterious lake. His life had been a swirl of incoherent thoughts and feelings. Events blurred into one, feelings were confused.  
  
Suddenly, he became aware of slow footsteps behind him. He turned, and saw a girl.  
  
From what he could make out in the moonlight, she was dressed in the normal attire: a dark blouse, and trousers. She concealed her hair in a bandanna, and even in the dim moonlight he could make out her doe-eyes, which sparkled. But what was perhaps most striking about her was a star imprinted on her right cheek. It was a perfect five-pointed star, and shimmered as the light played across her face.  
  
"It's really beautiful up here," she said softly, her eyes looking wistfully out at the moon.  
  
He was silent. He had no idea who she was, but for some reason...he didn't feel as though she was an intruder.  
  
"You wondering who I am?" she asked, turning towards him, a smile playing along her lips. He didn't answer, but instead, stared at her.  
  
"I live down there," she said, jerking a finger at the houses in the distance. "You do realise that every night when I draw my curtains, I can always see this lone figure on the cliff?"  
  
Ah. So that was how she knew where he was.  
  
"Don't say much do you?" she said softly. "But I think you're here for a reason."  
  
That caught his attention. He sat up on his rock.  
  
"You're here because life sucks," she whispered, turning once again to look at the stars.  
  
There was something about this girl. Already he felt like maybe..she understood.  
  
"You know what?" she started after a few minutes of silence. "I had a rough day today."  
  
She turned to look at him, her doe-eyes peering directly at his face.  
  
"I got woken up early because my parents were arguing," she said, with a nervous laugh.  
  
He didn't know how to reply. How many times had that happened to him? He'd lost count.  
  
She carried on, her voice a pleasant ringing against the sound of the crickets chirping in the background.  
  
"And then, I had to leave. Couldn't handle it. They were screaming at each other so bad. So I left. I went out with my friends. But then when I returned..."  
  
Her voice broke off sharply. Through the moonlight, he could see tears glistening in her eyes.  
  
"You know what? Not once have my parents ever said they love me," the tears were threatening to spill from her eyes.  
  
He could relate to this. He tried to stop the memories from overpowering him, but he couldn't stop it.  
  
...Flashbacks of how he had tried to love his Grandfather, but then he was pushed away, told to go and practice.  
  
..How he was shouted at for being useless when he lost a match, and how his Grandfather ordered him to be locked in the dormitory, dank and cold, a hell for a child.  
  
...How he wanted to be hugged when he felt down, when in pain, when he was happy, but there was no one around to do this...  
  
He abruptly turned towards the girl, and focussed all his energies on stopping the memories.  
  
"Why are you telling me this?" he asked her harshly, rage in his voice.  
  
The tears were pouring down her face, her doe eyes a blurry pool in the dim light.  
  
"Because I have no one else to tell," she whispered.  
  
All his rage stopped. There was something they had in common..their lives were wretched. He took a sharp intake of breath, and folded his hands behind his head.  
  
"I think I understand," he said after a while, not daring to look at his face. This was hard for him, showing his emotions to someone.  
  
"I wouldn't. It's complicated," she answered, again in her soft voice.  
  
"You know, I cry at night sometimes. When everyone's asleep. I just can't hold it in." She turned to look at him again.  
  
"But I could never show how upset I am. No way. Not to my parents."  
  
He knew this so well. After all the things he had been through..the rage, the not knowing, the controlling..  
  
He'd learnt to encase his heart in ice. Untouchable. A dark hole in his body. Void of all emotion.  
  
He just didn't give a damn anymore, and was, well, a person supposedly devoid of all feeling.  
  
But he knew better. There were some things he just couldn't forget. Horrible, black periods in his mind. No person could forget those things.  
  
"But you know what I do?" the girl spoke again after a few minutes.  
  
He shook his head discreetly, and looked at her.  
  
"You see this star on my cheek?" she said, pointing a delicate hand at her face.  
  
He nodded, and stared at it.  
  
"I wish. It's symbolic of a shooting star. One day.." Her voice quivered again. She wiped her eyes, and then looked at him, her doe eyes bright. "I wish that some day, things will be alright. I can wake up feeling happy. In a place where I feel as though I belong. Where I'm not forgotten. Wanted."  
  
He didn't know how to answer. If wishing was a solution, he'd have been happy a long time ago.  
  
"And you know what?" she continued, looking back at the sky again. "There's a meteor shower soon. Which is another reason why I'm up here."  
  
She smiled at him, a brave smile that said a thousand words.  
  
"I'm going to wish."  
  
Kai looked up at the sky. Then he saw it: that first trickle of light, shooting down seemingly from the heavens, heading towards the dark abyss of the earth.  
  
Soon, what seemed like thousands of stars came shooting down, a magnificent display of colour and life.  
  
He turned to look back at the girl..but she was gone.  
  
He did not know who she was, why she was there, why she would speak to him. But he felt as though he'd known her his entire life.  
  
Peering back at the skies, he looked at the stars, their tails of vibrant light brightening up the atmosphere.  
  
And he wished.  
  
And there was hope. 


End file.
